Calling all true Aussies
Tues 3 March 09
Calling all true Aussies – where the bloody hell are ya
The organisers of the World Push Up
Championships, which is taking place in Wellington on the
28th March 09, have to date been unable to get any
Australian entries. It was expected that our friends from
across the Tasman, the home of Ned Kelly, Crocodile Dundee
and budgie smugglers would have been lining up to show how
‘man’ they are. In fact the reality seems to be the
exact opposite.
According to Columba Cryan,
President of the World Push Ups Federation “with the size
of the country and its population, relative to other great
sources of contestants, and previous winners, like New
Zealand, the continued absence of Aussies who are man enough
to take on the world’s best at push ups is astounding.
With their numerical advantage it is a clear case of the
‘odds are good but the goods are odd’. It has become
such a running theme that we have for the past two years
awarded the ‘Australian Push Up Championship’ title to
the weakest contestant in the World champs.”
Mr.
Cryan and the World Push Ups team have been searching for
Aussies to add to the field of European, Kiwi and US
representatives taking past in this year’s contest but to
no avail. This year we have tried all the local AFL clubs
and the Aussie consulate in an attempt to find an Aussie
ex-pat who might have had this innate fear of push ups bred
out of them. But to date all our efforts have proved
unsuccessful”
Irishman Daithi O’Connor, current
title holder, said the lack of Aussie men was a constant
source of amazement to him. “I come from Cork, Ireland
which has a population of less than half a million people,
and has produced two world champs like. To me, Australia
has a large population of macho poseurs. I bet you that
they are just not man enough. It’s a shame cause I love
beatin the Aussies. Like the English, it’s a special
feeling to beat the head of them. But sure I don’t care
who turns up I’ll kick their arse”.
According
to Mr. Cryan, the World Push Ups team is still looking for
an Aussie contestant and, in fact, anyone interested in
participating has until Tuesday 17th March for the St
Patrick’s Day face-off of all contestants in Wellington to
register. All would-be contestants, especially Aussies,
can register their interest in participating at
wwwpushups.co.nzby the 17th March.
According to Mr.
Cryan “It’s the home of winners like Don Bradman but
their poor achievements on the sporting field over the past
years seems to be impacting on their appetite to even
compete. I’m sure that Aussie men are too busy these
days practicing their song and dance routines with
hairbrushes in front of mirrors and dreaming of big romantic
epics. We’d love to see an Aussie contestant and heaven
knows even a winner, but with similar lily-livered responses
already this year, we suspect to see the winner will likely
come from the traditional powerhouses of Europe, the US and
New
Zealand”.
Ends