Kamala Sarup: Women Power And Sub-Process To Live

A serene hill of suffering collapsed. Leaves fell and the environment became awful. Her mother died, a sad death. Death defeated her. She went never to return.

Since I have been knowing, she is a serious woman. She used look up in the sky and try her best to lead life towards reality. She always would find herself a distressed. Perhaps, because she could never befriend with happiness. In totality, she was desolate and lonely in the open road. Perhaps her bygone days brought him on such a corner of reconciliation that from where she began to get trapped herself and now she has been living in a paradox giving a shape to fears as her own. That day a flood of sorrows flowed on her grave face. She wept too much and the crying of the relatives made her tender heart broken.

A dreadful night! Dogs were barking and in the emptiness within of some noises of people her mother had left her. The burden of looking after other's lives fell on his soldier; she became dumb founded and kept weeping looking at the mother. Perhaps she was horrified to spend the rest of life in the absence of mother. Nevertheless, she had to live and start preparing to live. She was great and would not let life to scatter anywhere.

In fact, life does mean a difficult journey and this journey is always an infinite. Sometimes, she used to tell me story of the journey of her life. It was that she would long to fly in the sky in childhood. She had wished to be a prestigious and successful person. But she had never been able to attain a completeness in life. Therefore, she had left village to bring light in life. Especially, her mother had wept a lot at it for many days, she begged for her daughter's return though she was a wise and honest. To choose one from two things – life and marriage, she had chosen life and had escaped from home twelve years age carrying a dream to become a great person. She remembered her mother a lot there and the newly married wife. Though remembering brothers and sisters, she escaped from home. Life means to struggle and she did such a struggle where she never could remain happy. She had not made journey so miserable in poverty and imbalanced situation.

Gradually her life started towards some mode. She spent many years in success and transitional state. She forgot her life and fell in love with some one else. She might be in need of love and started a new life there ignoring all social old customs and boundaries. She was a kind-hearted person and could become prestigious too. Because now she is known as a 'kind woman' in society. And she is living within a limited happiness for she can not break a wall of her great mental distress. She had dreamt about many things in life, little she had read about life, a small beautiful home, great lifestyle, struggling life, and a peaceful family. However, she never could make complete her uncompleted journey that she had started. She had been broken hearted at her brother's death, had felt lonely at sister's death and mother also left her now.

Nowadays, she weighs himself many times on an unending struggle. She looks up in the sky from the top of the house until 10-11 o'clock in the night. She keeps watching at the shining moon and weeps feeling that the night also is not for her. However, her sorrow is as incomplete as her journey and she is living in between a risk of an incomplete life struggle and a waiting for an another dawn- on the sub-process to live infinitely.

Nepali Journalist and Story Writer Kamala Sarup is an editor of peacejournalism.com. She is specialising in in-depth reporting and writing on Peace, Anti War, Women, Terrorism, Democracy, and Development. Some of her publications are: Women's Empowerment (Booklet). Prevention of trafficking in women through media,(Book) Efforts to Prevent Trafficking in for Media Activism (Media research). Two Stories collections. Her interests include international conflict resolution, cross-cultural communication, philosophy, feminism, political, socio-economic and literature. Her current plans are to move on to humanitarian work in conflict areas in the near future. She also is experienced in organizational and community development.

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