Brash Still Leads Nats, Moore PM

Scoop Note: News too good to be true from the chronicle of Moenui - proud holder of the 'Northern Region Best Kept Grass Verge Award'

New Zealanders awoke this morning to the startling news that Don Brash is still the leader of the National Party causing suggestions that the media is unreliable and fuelling rumours that a toupee-wearing Mike Moore may have been Prime Minister for the past seven years.

The endlessly predicted fall of Dr Brash, first reported by Nostradamus in a 1557 edition of Quatrains, is being regarded with increased scepticism by the public. Moenui commentator Frank Lush told the Kiwi Herald that the failure of the prediction to come to fruition was causing widespread doubt in the veracity of media reports.

"Lets face it," said Mr Lush, "By my count, the coup against Don Brash has been announced 373 times by media in the past seventeen weeks and the wiley old bugger is still there. The gap between forecast and fact is leading to a real crisis of confidence in the fourth estate."

Speaking from the Sports Bar of the Masonic Hotel, Lush described the the on-going 'fall of Brash' story as the New Zealand equivalent of US reportage of imminent victory in Iraq.

"No one really believes it anymore. Everyone knows that the supposedly bumbling Magoo-like Brash has turned out to have a sex-life of an Al Qaeda prince and is forever in secret meetings with jokers who are on first-name basis with the big fella upstairs. John Key on the other hand is turning out to be a smiling Donald Rumsfeld; big on promise but tardy on delivery."

Lush says that some kiwis he has spoken with have completely lost faith with the media reportage. "Just yesterday some bloke staggered into the bar out of the driving rain and said,"If that's the 'sun with occasional cloud' the TV reckoned we were due for, Mike Moore's the Prime Minister."

ENDS

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