NSW Women Celebrate Solidarity

20 September

Once again, a group of rural women added their own brand of magic to the NSW Women in Dairy (WiD) Bale Up conference in Sydney from September 9 to 12.

More than 100 women from throughout rural NSW and Victoria converged on Sydney’s inner city for the annual conference that has now been held in various centres around the state. With a focus on bridging the gap between the farmer and the general public, rural health, and personal stories of rural women who shared personal challenges and how they survived.

The conference’s keynote speaker, sports broadcaster Erin Molan didn’t mince words on her own career challenges in a male-dominated world combined with the judgement of social media.

This conference continues to hit a nerve for some special reasons, according to its organisers. Its Master of Ceremony June Tarlinton comes from the generation who “soldiered on” and found relief in humour. She was joined by the next generation who find solace in connection and expression.

“I think this year was more difficult to organise because it was in the heart of Sydney, but I think the outcome was fabulous,” June said. “The extra activities we could do because we were in the city included the harbour cruise and the Harbour Bridge Climb.

“For me, the speakers this year really resonated because they told the truth and shared their honest feelings. It was very emotional…but extraordinary at the same time.”

Creating safe spaces

She says WiD continues to curate a “safe space” for women.

“I think it’s because women can come and be themselves and express themselves the way they actually do feel. The girls who plan this conference fully understand the experiences the guest speakers have had, because they’ve experienced some of those things themselves.”

NSW WiD president Renae Connell, from Dorrigo, NSW, together with her vice-president Gemma Otton, from Candelo, met at the conference five years ago when they first attended. Now, they lead the movement.

“We try and keep it authentic to us, and we’ve got a clear goal of it not being corporate,” Renae said. “There are other conferences out there that do that. In the early days a lot of feedback was that they want to come and learn, but they also need that connection with other women that were doing the same thing. They wanted this to be different, and that’s what it is.

“I’ve got lovely girlfriends who live in town, and I talk to them about my struggles with being on the land and having a dairy farm, and although they try, they don’t really get it. It’s really important for dairying women to all get together and realise they aren’t alone. That there are other women who go through similar things.”

Gemma agreed.

“We like to keep the conference upbeat, but we know that the dairy industry isn’t all fun and games, and cute little calf pictures. We try and keep that real.

“Because there are a lot of isolated dairy communities in Australia. Bega is Bega…it’s just Bega. Up the far north coast, farms are in little pockets. In Victoria, there is more dairy and they are all quite close together. Being able to link those Victorian and our NSW ladies and realise that we are all doing the same thing in different places and in different ways is important.”

The point of it all

Renae said whether they had 100 or 200 attendees wasn’t the point.

“We’re always happy to get whoever we get. Whether we’re helping 100 or 130 women, it’s still helping. It’s still really important, and we do the same amount of work for 30 people as we would for 130.”

Dorrigo plateau farmer Donna Darley came to the conference after the men in her family encouraged her to get off-farm for a break. She was grateful they pushed her to take some time away from their 380-cow operation.

“I’m going home with more connection and the realisation that we are all in the same boat at the end of the day,” Donna said.

“You get all these things in your head that it’s too expensive, but you’ve just got to think of yourself sometimes. We’re all at different levels in our progress and stage of life. The older ones can learn from the younger ones and the younger ones have a lot of vibe and drive, but they’ve got families as well so it’s nice to encourage them through the system.

“I walked away thinking that maybe I can put a little bit more into my own system. Because you get to the point where you wonder, ‘What else can I do?’ But then you listen to some of the stories, and you realise that you have a heap more to give.

“It was great to get a reset and a new perspective.”

Sponsors behind the scenes

Daviesway DASCO has been one of the conference’s consistent sponsors – acknowledging the WiD’s important role within industry. Daviesway DASCO’S Keryn Nunan was impressed.

“It was my first time here personally since joining Daviesway, and I left feeling very reassured that we have so many great mentors, young and old, leading our industry,” Keryn said.

“The passion, energy and initiatives from the younger participants was so inspiring.

“The stories of hardship, tragedy and challenge highlighted how fragile life can be, but there is always a sisterhood who will believe in you, pick you up, and help mend the pieces.

“The true success of an event is when a committee – that are all volunteers – make it look so seamless.”

Changing outcomes

Once again, the conference included the Rural Adversity Mental Health Program’s Jennie Keioskie. Jennie, who is based in Bega, has become a popular addition to the conference since its inception with her upbeat and fun programmes that allow people to peel back layers in a safe space. She said it was important to have consistency and familiar faces, because it took time to build trust in an industry that is incredibly demanding.

“The first time we did Bale Up, those conversations were really challenging for people,” Jennie said. “Now, mental health is front and centre at every single conference because I think there is an acknowledgement that to be an effective person in life – particularly with all the challenges that dairy farming throws at you – if you’re not ok, there is no way you can be there for other people. You can’t make good decisions, you struggle to function day-to-day, and to make good life choices. That includes how you manage your farm and your animals.

“We’ve had people come to us this conference and thank us and tell us that our work here was a turning point in their life, where they had to acknowledge what was happening.”

“People have implemented real change, and they have seen the results of their work, and so much so that they are confident to get up and talk about it. It’s been really lovely to hear all that.

“The other thing I’m so immensely proud of – and why I love WiD so much – is that they are an incredible bunch of really strong community-connected individuals. If one of them is down, the rest of them moo… It’s bloody tough out there, and you don’t have to do it alone. “The quicker you get in there and get the help, the easier it is. Mental health problems are really common, but they are also really treatable.”

Acknowledge the tough – embrace the fun

The secret sauce within this conference is the warmth and inclusiveness, which included a donation to the McGrath Foundation. The final word went to Gemma Otton in her closing address.

“We’ve made new friends, rekindled old friendships, and hopefully made industry contacts that might actually respond to our messages,” she smiled.

“Make sure you stay connected in between Bale Up. It really does help in the tough times.

“And, remember life is like a unicorn. Magical, a bit mysterious and always better with a sprinkle of sparkles. So, go on out there and chase those rainbows, and may your days be filled with more glitter than a unicorn’s sneeze.”

Next year’s dates and venue are yet to be set, but if you are interested in being involved follow NSW Women in Dairy & Bale Up on Facebook.

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